The First Mann on Mars - Chapter Eight

Chapter Eight of the hilarious new science fiction novel, The First Mann on Mars by best selling, multi-award-winning author Mark Watson...

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The First Mann on Mars

©Copyright 2024 by Mark Watson

THE STORY SO FAR…

Moronic Billionaut Derek Mann, along with his snarky, silver AI sidekick Barry Wilkinson, have been rescued from an ugly, dangerous spaceship and have now landed on Mars. Back on Earth, things have gone predictably wrong—most of Northern Europe has been obliterated after Derek’s genius friend Noel decided to crank the Large Hadron Collider up to eleven. The rest of the planet is now enjoying the charming chaos of a post-apocalyptic era. Meanwhile, Derek and Barry have discovered that Mars is far from a barren dustbowl…

Chapter Eight: Fake Ars

Derek, Barry, and Doreen hurtled through the lush Martian landscape in a vehicle that looked as though it had been cobbled together from spare parts and a healthy disregard for aerodynamics. Doreen narrated their journey with great enthusiasm, pointing at various incomprehensible landmarks and saying things like, “That’s where we gurp the slurbongs!” Derek and Barry, who were becoming adept at nodding vacantly, did just that.

Before long, they screeched to a halt outside a giant warehouse. Its façade was dominated by a large sign that read “Fake Ars,” as the “M” had long since retired from its duties. The entire structure had an air of profound neglect, as though it had decided years ago to stop trying and was just waiting for someone to knock it down. In other words, it looked rather dilapidated.

“It looks rather dilapidated,” Barry observed dryly.